Tee-hee

smile (:

Fcuker face?

  • Dad: Yeah, he's kind of shady. I never knew if he was genuine or not.
  • Me: What a sucky person.
  • Dad: Sometimes he nice and sometimes he not.
  • Me: Huh.
  • Dad: He has a good fcuker face.
  • Me: what face?
  • Dad: fcuker face.
  • Me: ... OH! You mean poker face?
  • Dad: Yes, fcuker face.

Slushie?

  • Mom: Can you go to 7-up?
  • Me: ???
  • Mom: I want to drink slushie.
  • Me: Did you mean 7-Eleven..?
  • Mom: Oh... yes.

You're too cute.

  • Mom: Why did the hot dog wear a coat?
  • [pause/snicker]
  • Mom: CAUSE IT WAS A CHILI-DOG!

Lyrics

  • Mom: So I really want to listen to this one song.
  • Me: Okay, what's the title of the song?
  • Mom: I don't know.
  • Me: Hmmm.. okay. Do you know any parts of the lyrics?
  • Mom: Oh! I know the chorus part!
  • Me: Okay! How does it go?
  • Mom: La la la la la!

Good thinking...

  • Me: Dad, you know your phone’s broken, right?
  • Dad: I know. Callers hear static noise… they think I’m in some storm.
  • Me: Do you want me to eBay you a new one?
  • Dad: No.
  • Me: ?
  • Dad: This way people hang up faster.